Originally posted on BeVibrant.com, Planned Parenthood of the Rocky Mountains’ sex toy shop that has since been shut down. Reproduced here with permission.
If you’re considering pegging, you’re in good company. The cultural fascination with pegging is opening doors (specifically, back doors) to a whole new world of anal pleasure. The conversation about pegging is finally becoming normalized, which means more sexual bliss for everyone. This fun, pleasurable-for-both-partners activity is a totally normal part of a healthy sex life. If you’ve never tried it before, read the guide below for ideas for newbies, then put your harness on and dive in!
A Brief History of Pegging, for Beginners
There are a few things about pegging that you should know before getting started. Pegging is a relatively new term when compared with the long and colorful history of human sexuality. The term comes from a vote Dan Savage held in 2001 to create the term that should be used when a woman uses a strap-on with a man, and the word pegging won. Prior to that, the idea had been popularized by a series of sex ed videos that caught on in 1998, called, “Bend over boyfriend.”
Today, pegging has a much broader use, and gendering the term is totally unnecessary. Anyone can peg or be pegged, which is one of the many awesome aspects of pegging!
Pegging is Great for People of All Genders, Abilities, Sexualities, and Ages
If you’ve always been on the receiving end of penetration, it’s obvious why mixing it up might be fun. But many elements within pegging make it a great source of pleasure no matter who you are or how you identify. Everyone has an anus, and nearly everyone can wear a harness, so pegging is truly the great sexual equalizer.
People with prostates can potentially orgasm from the stimulation, and clitoral nerve endings reach as far as the anus, so stimulation is possible for those with clits as well. Plus, many dildos now have vibrators that can bring pleasure to both sides of the pegging equation.
If a penis-wielder is experiencing ED (erectile dysfunction) or impotence, pegging can be a great option that takes the focus off of the ability to get an erection for penetration. For folks with disabilities, arthritis, balance impairments, spasms or other physical mobility issues, pegging frees up your hands for increased stability. Sometimes other life factors such as illness, mental health, or prescriptions with side effects can be the reason behind the desire to give pegging a try – no matter the reason, fun is in store for those who are game. So, buckle up! Or, rather, strap in. 😉
Communication is Key
The key to enjoying pegging is communicating with your partner. Ask what type of thrusting they are interested in. For beginners, the peggee may want to back up onto the dildo slowly so they can go at their own pace, after warming up with a finger or two, of course! Seasoned peggers may have no such desire.
Starting in a lying down position is often easiest to compensate for any height differences. Missionary or spoon are fun, intimate ways to start, and as you become comfortable, you can experiment with more. Also, note that if your partner has a penis, the presence of an erection does not always serve as a good gauge for arousal during pegging. It’s often not hard at all! The prostate is a completely different sensation and the two types of pleasure don’t always visibly overlap. So communication will be critical to understanding if your partner is enjoying the pegging.
Lastly, note that the person wearing the harness cannot always tell if the dildo has come out of the anus since there isn’t much sensation where the dildo meets the harness. The pegger can feel like they’re flying blind, so to speak. So if you notice there’s been a slip, just speak up.
Picking Out Gear
If you’re the pegger, you’re going to want to find a quality harness – the more secure, the better. Steer clear of elastic based harnesses that don’t have adjustable capability; these harnesses can feel loose and out of control for the pegger. It’s hard enough to aim when you don’t have acute sensation down there! Further, if you have multiple partners, or ever switch positions to be on the receiving end of pegging, you’re going to want to make sure the harness can be secured to a broad spectrum of sizes. Also, getting a longer dildo can be helpful for those with less flexibility, since it is easier to try more positions without having super flexible hips.
If you’re the peggee, make sure you’re comfortable with the size of the dildo. Start small and don’t scale up until you’re good and ready.
Beginners might like to try this handy Bend Over Beginner Kit by Tantus. The adjustable harness makes for secure, non-wobbly pegging, and comes with two differently sized dildos so you can level up whenever you’re ready!
For a fun twist for peggers with vulvas, try the Feeldoe Stout by Tantus! It’s not a harness you wear, but a dildo you insert into the vagina and hold steady via pc muscles. It can be tricky to get the angle just right, but it only takes some maneuvering, communication, practice, and patience! Plus, there’s always the option to wear a harness with these for a little extra help. Depending on the arousal of the pegger, sometimes things get a little slippery!
If you are unable to thrust with your hips, this Sportsheets thigh harness makes easy work of pegging. Since it is adjustable, you could also strap it to your face as a receiver, if that’s your jam.
The Joque by Spareparts is the best of both worlds: comfortable, underwear-like fit, with customizable capabilities! It has a special pocket for a bullet vibe, so both partners can receive a little buzz of pleasure during the act. Plus, when you’re finished, you can just throw this harness in the washing machine.
So, now that you have your ideal gear in mind, the next step – if you feel ready – is to give it a try! Broaden your sexual horizons, satisfy your anal curiosity, and try something new.
Questions About Pegging?
Vibrant has lots of fun harnesses and dildos perfect for pegging for beginners, and each toy meets the very highest standards of safety – because we care about your health. Chat with us, and we can help recommend the product that’s perfect for you. We’re available 9am-9pm EST daily on our website chat (just push the purple button at the bottom right!) or call us at 866-316-VIBE (8423).
Kempf Writing & Editing, LLC 